You’ve trained your brain to accept imbalance as normal, and you take on other people’s energy as a result. This call offers comfort about the anger and regrets you may feel as a result, along with a quick sketching activity to help you rebalance and retain your energy.
When to Use
You Are Experiencing:
Strong regrets coming up as you move through a plan
Anger for feeling responsible for your family’s emotions
Frustration for not being acknowledged for the work you do
Despair from living with an overly-critical spouse
You Want To:
Accept all emotions as proof that healing is happening
Give everyone’s own energy back to them
Create experiences where you’re appreciated for being you
Recognize where you need to make changes to create peace
Affirmation for this Session:
I am activating and sustaining my own regenerative healing abilities.
For Repeat Visits:
Questions begin at 13:28
Hello, welcome to this month’s live coaching call. I am your host and leading healer, Carol Tuttle. Thanks for being a part of the Healing Center, whether you’re watching this live, say hello in a comment if you’re watching live, tag someone you know that’s in the Healing Center, they can jump on so that they might not have remembered we’re live tonight.
So this show is to support you and the healing work you’re doing in the Carol Tuttle online Healing Center. So we’re here to support you. We’ve selected questions that were pre-submitted. And we will also be choosing questions from our live comment threads. So if you have a question, you can go ahead and post those in the thread. And if we feel it’s applicable to the broader audience here, we really try to strive to have questions that will have the ability…so write it in a way that it would be supportive to meet my feedback, to be more broad, and it’s in how I can support the whole community.
I’m excited to announce that we’ve had…we’re over 800 members today, my goal is to get to our first 1,000, and on the 17th of December, which is in a couple weeks, I’m going to be announcing some new updates that we’re going to be offering here through the Healing Center that makes it, I think, one of the most phenomenal places for the investment that you give if you’re willing…if you commit your time, that’s, you know, for the dollar amount invested and as you commit your time you’re going to get…it is to me one of the most phenomenal returns on progressing in getting your true self back that you may have never had. And progressing with your life on to that path and purpose rather than coping with the residual effects of whatever you’ve passed through in your life.
So on the 17th, on my Energy Profiling with Carol live Facebook show that I go live on Monday at 1 p.m. Mountain Time, I’m gonna be announcing some really exciting updates of what we’re going to be doing in the Healing Center in 2019. And I hope you’ll be a part of all that. And then on January 10th, I have my first big announcement for 2019 that does support the healing experience in the Healing Center, I’m very excited about this, it’s a support tool that I’ve been working on for several months with some very skilled specialists in their field and it will be announced on January 10th what that offering will be.
I have recorded new material that we’re going to start releasing in the next few weeks. What I can tell you about, I’ve had some new clearing sessions I’ve added. The one I want to tell you about though is I know many of you are very fond and have great affection for the Tibetan healing bowls, the singing bowls. And you find them very nurturing and I have experienced personally the healing effect that sound can have on our personal energy system, both our brainwave state, our energy meridians where the energy flows, it can calm that down, open our energy points, calm the brainwaves, all that affect then is you affect your kind of neurological system and nervous system, you’re affecting your ability to maintain higher thought patterns, meaning positive thoughts, calming the frontal lobe. The frontal lobe is where most of that worry thought takes place. I’ll have to update you. I’m not going to take time tonight, but many of you follow me on Instagram and are aware that I recently had a second SPECT scan done with my brain. And that’d be an interesting thing for me to share with you what I learned in this follow-up, two years after my original. The good news is that in my frontal lobe where a lot of the tendency for OCD thinking, the tendency for anxiety had had a very significant change and gotten quieter. It had calmed down. The activity was much less. So all the things I’ve been doing these last two years have really paid off. And so these sound Tibetan healing bowls effect that part of your brain which can calm your neurology and your nervous system and puts you in a more relaxed state.
So my announcement is I felt moved to create a custom soundtrack using, collectively, I have between my daughter and I, 10 healing bowls. We got together in the studio recently and we recorded a custom soundtrack that will be released in each healing plan. We’re going to put it in the daily activity as a bonus daily activity. I kept the soundtracks quite short. They’re no more than four minutes, three and a half was arranged because you can always repeat those and even have that ability to…you don’t need a lot of time with them, but you can put yourself in a state of calm. You can train your neurology and your nervous system to respond just kind of like Pavlov’s dogs. You know, it’s like a sound has that effect on us that it will trigger a calming response. And so I can’t give you an exact date. I’m working with our…my…we’re figuring out the release date for those, when we’re going to get those uploaded, I suspect it will be in December that we’ll be able to get those published because I just got word that the final edits are close to being done. I listened to some of the tracks, some of them have some really soothing additional audio backing it up, like some sounds in nature, sounds of water. So I’m really thrilled about that because it’s a really beautiful piece to add to your healing experience that I love anything that requires less effort from us. The more we can remove our thinking mind and the figuring it out process, our healing ability kicks in.
I’m a big believer that we came with the power of healing, that anything that we kind of came up against in life, we came with that intelligence of healing within us. Our job is to activate. Learn how we’re sabotaging it. How we get in the way of it. How we stifle it. How we go back. It’s the whole… You heard me share like I did last time, the falling in the hole because you keep walking down the same path, we do that to ourselves. So when you finally choose a new path where there’s no hole in it, you sustain your ability. Your system now is in a regenerative function versus a survival one. See, and many of you come into the Healing Center in a more of a survival state, coping, making up the difference, the body’s taken a hit, it wears you out eventually. And you are training your whole anatomy, all the function of you, your personal energy system to now engage and create a regenerative healing status of your being. And the healing soundtracks will be a great aid to that. I’ve always said, you know, that’s one reason I’m a big fan of therapeutic gemstones is because they’re doing healing work on you and all you got to do is put it on. You don’t have to figure things out. And that’s why I love the healing plans.
Those were real inspired, the hit to make those, I remember when that came, I was meeting with Anne my content director and my CEO Tanner, who happens to be her husband, and I knew I couldn’t just put you into this healing space with all these hundred plus resources and hope you’d figure it out. And it dawned on me that if you were to come see me in person, I would have a whole, you know, two to four-week strategy for you. I would see the bigger picture of what you would need to do to get to a shift so that you’d be in a different place. Maybe you weren’t 100% complete in healing it, but you are in a different place with it. You make progress. And I remember saying to Tanner, “I need to provide healing plans. I need to give people guidance because they’re not going to know what to do. It’s too much. There are so many resources in here. I need to give people guidance as though they were actually seeing me in person.” So I claim you all as my clients. You’re my virtual clients. I’m here to support you. I’ve spent years of doing practitioner work of studying patterns, understanding the psyche that drives these patterns. I have a vast background and understanding what keeps us stuck and what really generates healing as quickly as we’re capable of experiencing that, which is quite fast these days. It’s very quick. And so it’s more the real once you made the shift, you’ve heard me say this, it’s not so much that healing, changing your state of energy can happen very quickly, it’s anchoring that. He said, “Our energy is like jello, it needs to set.” And you got to keep repeating new patterns. That’s why it’s important to be reading “Mastering Affluence,” which is the life skills part of the healing work you’re doing.
If you have not yet picked up that book, grab a copy of “Mastering Affluence,” make it your support system to learn new skills. Life skills that you need, how to think differently, how to change your perception, how to be conscientious of your feeling states, and how to pattern new states of feeling that put you in charge of the skills you need so that you’re not just hoping somehow you just wake up and you’re doing all that different. It gives you a lot of support of how to experience your relationship with money different, and how to experience your relationship with your body differently. It supports you with a lot of information on how to create partnership in your relationship. Even I love the communication tips that I included in the book. It’s just a volume of…any one of the sections in there could be a standalone support tool and I put it all in one, in a 420-plus page book that is going to be useful for years and years to come. So grab “Mastering Affluence,” go to masteringaffluence.com to pick up a copy of that.
Exciting to announce those things. There’s more coming and we’re always thinking about enhancing the space and making sure that you’re going to have an experience, you know, if you do your part, you’re going to be able to say, “My life is better because of my experience in the Healing Center.” And I believe that completely. I’m very passionate about that. I guarantee that. I know that is the outcome you are meant to have and will have, it just requires your participation.
So I want to share a success story. [inaudible 00:12:07] success story. I started with the weight loss plan and switched to self-confidence and decided to take a break from checking the scale for about a week and a half. I just got curious today and didn’t have high expectations but jumped on and I’ve lost five pounds. I was so happily surprised. Obviously, my body is letting go some things it needed to. I’ve also noticed I feel more balanced these days, huge win for me. I love that success story. Thank you for sending that in. Or we grabbed that probably off the Facebook page.
So I had a quote I wanted to share, if Christine wanted to throw that up into the lobby section there, because I loved it. I saw it recently and it’s really cute. We’ll get to that if she has a chance to do that. But let’s get right into the questions. And go ahead and submit a question, and it may be selected for me to answer right here on the air. This is our last live… Oh, she said she’ll add it to the Facebook group. It’s really cute. Maybe you can… Let’s see. I want to read to you what it said though. Oh, I don’t have that. Send me the screenshot of it, Christine. All right, so back to the questions.
While reading “Mastering Affluence” and doing the related work, I realized that I play the role of emotional whipping post in my family, meaning that when my husband or sons are experiencing emotions, they don’t know how to label or process. They project on to me with attacks and blame. How do I clear this pain so it’s not…no longer my role?
First of all, good for you to recognize that this is happening. See, your first step in all healing and change is awareness, recognizing this is happening, because until you become conscious of something, you have no power to change it. Now, the interesting thing about energy is it needs to be accounted for. It’s just hanging out there and for it to come to resolution, so it’s not, you know, filling your homes up with toxicity, and most likely you were raised in a family system where this became a role for you. So this goes way back to some early days of you playing a role for accounting for the energy. I know I did this in my upbringing. It’s like nobody’s putting words to this. No one’s showing up saying, “This is how I’m feeling. This is what I’m emoting. This is what is bothering me. This is what I need to recognize is my stuff.” So, you know, good ol’ Carol decides because I’m such a strong empath that I was as a child even, I start to be the intersection for this, you know, and to recognize that several decades ago in my healing work, that I allowed myself to be the crossroads and have my own body become the point of accountability, somebody needed to so it could shift because it’s uncomfortable hanging out in that energy, especially for someone like me who doesn’t want to feel it.
So I did that a lot in our relationship where I’d be the one to feel what was going on in my experience in my marriage. And so as I’ve become more conscientious of that, and I no longer am choosing to be the one accountable. The interesting thing as well is when you choose to be the intersection and let that run through your system, it will get multiplied and magnified, it’ll compound for you and it’ll get expressed bigger. And then you’re really, really the point of attraction to say you’re the one with the problem because you’re the one getting all upset because it’s now kind of blown up in your system, you feel it with more potency and you need to dump it and unload it.
So you’ll, in dysfunctional ways, try and emote that, you know, express it to be free of it. Then everyone can turn to you and say, “We’re all calm. We feel great. What’s wrong with you?” See? And that’s really not in your best interest because you’re just trying…you know, you get pegged the bad guy in the family, like well…and you’re taking all their junk and they’re all feeling great. They’re like, “We feel great. We’re calm. What’s wrong with you?” So what do you do? Well, really learn the techniques I teach in the two sessions I’m going to recommend you, the mirror women or mirror man. You need to catch yourself. Now you’ll catch yourself in stages. You’ll go, “Oh my goodness. You took it on again.” Now give it back. This is this is mine. That is theirs. You don’t have to figure out what they do with it. Let them start to feel it. Let them wrestle with it. Let them come to you and want your support and learning how to handle the emotion. And if you have to remove yourself from the scene, do, because you’re not very good at it yet. See, I’ll do this with John. I’ll say I’m vulnerable and I’ll say I need to give myself space, because we’ve openly discussed this dynamic. He needs to go through the emotion. I’m one that pretty…feels pretty neutral most of the time, you know, as a byproduct of how I’ve gone to a place of healing.
So what you want to do is this is their…this is me, that is theirs. Do the mirror experience, go through that session. And then also, you want to learn giving people their baggage. Let them figure out what to do with the energy they’re creating. If they come to you to receive support, then they’re being accountable for it. They’re being accountable for it, ask their angels to come in and help them. You could even imagine with the baggage scenario, you know how people get handcuffed to a piece of luggage because they don’t want to lose it? Well, do that, handcuff their stuff in bags to their wrists, like there’s no chance you let go of this. As this becomes a dance subconsciously where they’re like on a subconscious level, they’re more than happy to let you take care of it and not have to take any… See, they think feeling feelings is there’s something to blame, you know, who are we blaming here? It’s like it’s just energy.
Hey, the quote’s been added. I’m going to show you this and we’ll get to our next question. I think this is just really clever. If you feel like you don’t fit in the world, anybody raise your hand or share in a comment if you ever felt that way, it’s because you are here to help create a new one. I really related to that. And on so many stages of my life, I felt like you don’t really fit here. I’m like, “Anne, you know, this human thing is a rough place.”
So second question, the last couple of days I feel like I’m drowning in regrets. Several stupid mistakes I haven’t thought of in years are resurfacing out of nowhere. I’ve looked through the program but I haven’t found a clearing for this.
What I wanna speak to in this is this is going to come up with any program you do. This is called healing. When you do a healing plan, you’re wanting to provoke anything from your past that is repressed that is feeding this state of being stuck and stifled. This is just the process of healing. It’s resurfacing. You get to a point where you’re inviting it. I know several of you have spoken to that in the Facebook threads to say, “I want things to come up now. I want to move this along. I have support here. I have tools. I’m ready.” And so don’t think of it as this phenomena, this is what healing is. The clearing sessions, the work you’re doing with the channeling plan is meant to stir up, bring back to the surface the things you’ve repressed that cause your imbalance state that we call sickness, disease, depression. It’s energy that regardless of the fact if we’re conscious, anything that’s held subconsciously, steal emotes from us, it affects the vibration we put out into the world and attracts to us the things we don’t want that are just more of the same old survival story playing out with different people and things. You want this to happen. Want for it to… So the healing plans go through them for each one. We have, “When to use,” the benefit that you’ll receive from it to help guide you in the selection of those.
My husband is a hoarder. How can I help him to feel safe enough so that he doesn’t have to surround himself with stuff? Now, I want to first give feedback to how this is written. My husband is a hoarder. All right, so you’ve recognized he has a pattern. Now, I’ve no idea if you’ve had an honest open conversation about this with him and he’s been able to say, “Yes, I am a hoarder. I have a fear of letting go of things.”
All right, so then when you phrase it as, “How can I help him to feel safe,” so that in itself is setting you up to take more responsibility for this than he is. So what we do when we take that position in a partnership or in a relationship, you’re energetically trumping him saying, “This is up to me,” for him to change. You do not want that. You want to be an ally in aid, a support, but you want to energetically have him be the more responsible one. So there’s a couple ways to enhance that. I don’t know your communication and if this is something that he’s even willing to take accountability for. So I’ll give you some variables.
You can and I’ve done this with certain situations that I know needed to shift in their own organic way and people needed to make decisions without me forcing something or trying to make something happen, I’ll pray and I’ll ask that the energy become more intense, more uncomfortable so that they’re moved to change. I’ve done that with some business situations where I was shown that some things needed to change but it was not supportive to the experience at large for me to go in and just, you know, “Okay, we are doing this different.” It needed to come from the people. They needed to initiate that and then I’m ready to support it. So you can ask it to be so increasingly uncomfortable they can’t stand it anymore. You can even do an energy sketch. Okay, again the baggage, see him covered up to here and it’s just like he can’t even move anymore. So he has to drive all this stuff around. Because that’s what it’s creating energetically. So he gets… Or like a ball and chain, all these things he’s dragging around and he’s like, “Oh my goodness, I don’t want to do this anymore. I want to get rid of stuff.”
So that’s one way. You know, if he’s open and you’re communicating, then that’s an opportunity for him to get involved here and do some when to child a healing. Because there’s something going on in his childhood with him afraid of losing something. What loss did he have early on around five to seven years old? What was the loss? What did he have no power in keeping in his life that was taken from him? Something occurred in his journey that he felt completely powerless to be able to sustain what he dearly loved. And so now all this is exaggerated and trying to make up a difference so you don’t have to feel that.
I know people that lived through the Depression, my mother-in-law was one who was a…she’d a very difficult time letting go of stuff because she was trained to believe that, you know, deprivation was right around the corner. My sense with him though, it was more on a personal level and more emotional what he lost and the things are just representing kind of filling that space so he doesn’t have to feel that vacuum. It’s like an old…a vacuum that he’s never healed and he’s filled it with this. So those are some tips on how to… And again, change your languaging here. My husband is a hoarder. How can I support him so he chooses to feel safe? It’s not your job to help him feel safe. You’re going to play a parent role and you do not want to put yourself in the parent energy with a spouse. Never works out. You’ll always fail them because their parents did to some degree and it’ll just go that way.
When is it best to sit with uncomfortable feelings and when is it best to do a clearing for releasing uncomfortable feelings? At the moment, I’m very aware of a pattern of shutting down my fifth chakra and self-expression. Your fifth chakra is your throat chakra. It’s your true voice being heard, your true thoughts being put to voice. And feeling a lot of anger. Let me back up. I’m very aware of a pattern of shutting down my voice and self-expression to gain approval in my family. I am feeling a lot of anger and grief around this. Also, trapped by my need for acceptance. I’ve been experiencing lower back pain, asthma, big knot in my throat. Journaling is helping, being outside is helping.
I don’t think there’s a when’s the best time to sit with it versus it’s there, it’s coming up. The clearing sessions don’t necessarily keep it from healing. They’re like, you know, let’s just say you’ve got an injury and you need you to need a boot on your foot or you need a…you have something that’s interfering with your ability to walk freely. It’s a crutch, it’s an aid, it’s a support tool, think of all the sessions as that. You want it to come up and be with it and let’s move this energy, you know, you don’t have to hang out in a certain timeline of discomfort. And whatever’s there is going to continue to unwind itself until I give yourself the support and know that it’s healing, and especially when anything has to do with this area of your expressive self, your voice, it’s really important to express that in journaling. Then I’d read it after. Use your voice, verbalize it, say it, whatever you’ve written, then take some time in a private place to read it.
What are the tools I recommend to help heal and open this energy center is to watch the movie about the king of England. Maybe someone can remember. But we had to have…voice…he had to have speech therapy. And to do all the things, it’s a fun way to open your voice because you just do what he’s doing in the movie. You watch it as a therapy tool. It’s really cool. I see the movie and the actor, it’s an excellent movie. So check that out as well. I’m sure someone knows that. King, king something. I think that’s part of the title.
I’m frustrated that I do not receive the recognition that I deserve for going above and beyond for free, in a big way at my work. I feel frustrated. I keep trying to figure out where being passed over comes from in my childhood so I can heal it. But I’m drawing a blank. “The King’s Speech.” But I’m drawing a blank. It seems that even going above and beyond doesn’t get me the recognition I need. I love bringing joy to others, but I need to either get paid and get the recognition to give me the boost to keep going or I’m going to withdraw and leave them hanging. I really would like to quit repeating this pattern and just feel good about me no matter if I do amazing work or not.
Hey, your whole concept of what you need to do to get recognition is flawed and that’s why it’s not working for you. Because in your effort to heal, if you’ve got a flawed pattern, it’s not going to work for you because the feedback you’re wanting to receive is you’re going about this in a dysfunctional way. So we don’t want, you know, you don’t want to get benefit and receive what you want from it, otherwise it’s going to reinforce you doing it. And where it’s flawed is you think you have to go above and beyond to get recognition.
So that’s what you’re looking for in your childhood, how much extra did you have to do to get next to nothing. Were you an… You know, okay, as I tune into your energy, and I have no idea who this is, and it’s the first time I’ve seen the question, it’s though you’re an older child, and I’d love for you to follow-up in a Facebook thread. Anybody, I’m giving feedback to, if I responded to your question, let me know how I did and how accurate my feedback was. It’s always fun to see. And you were an older child, I don’t think you were quite the oldest, maybe the oldest daughter. I’m thinking this is female. And the circumstances of the family required you to step in and play the surrogate parent. You went above and beyond.
So around age 12, you became very, very capable that you were executing parental-like abilities to support the family system. So it stole your childhood from you. But the 12-year-old decided I’m going to go above and beyond because I think I don’t get recognition so if I go above and beyond maybe that will do the trick. So the 12-year-old’s never dropped this formula. So you need to go back and meet with your 12-year-old and say, “Honey, you don’t need to do anything to get recognition. The whole idea that your recognition comes through doings is flawed.” You don’t have to use the word flawed with her. Don’t shame her. I’m telling you as an adult. Tell her you understand why she might have come to that conclusion. Show empathy, show to your inner child the empathy of how they would as a 12-year-old. She’s 12, of course they might draw that conclusion. They weren’t guided and understanding it any differently, you could see where she would have drawn that conclusion. And the fact that she was even smart enough to know she needed recognition, good for her. Celebrate that. Then release her. This is a part of you that never…that you abandoned your childhood because the need for recognition is much stronger than the need for fun.
See, if you again, given the recognition you need, you would have explored your childhood in a playful childlike manner. This is where you now get to enroll your inner child in claiming back their childhood. The 12-year-old needs to re-learn being 12 and they’ll just be confused. Like, you know, that’s like foreign territory. I don’t know how to just be 12. You need to enroll them in that because that’s a necessary part of your development, to have been given the chance to be your 12-year-old self and all the years prior to that. So do that work and let go of the… Let me give you an affirmation, rather than what you said here. The way you phrased it is I am receiving recognition for going above and beyond. How about I receive recognition for just being me. I receive recognition for just being me. My value has and always has been the fact that I exist. I receive reciprocity in my job, and personally, I’d want money. You know, that’s the thing. If you’re doing it to get, “You’re so amazing,” I’d rather just take care of that on my own and get paid, you know, I don’t want that to be the form of payment. This is a job, you need to be making money. I receive in a reciprocal manner what’s due me in a just and supportive way in the form of money, which encourages me to grow and develop my skill set. Something like that. You’re going to have to probably rewind this and write that down. But you see where I’m separating the two? Because you’re, you know, you’re stating in here you’re gonna have to move on, you’re going to quit. Well, you’ll never get what you want with this for this pattern in this flawed thinking that your 12-year-old didn’t know any better but to choose into that. So go help that little…that wonderful little girl out and free yourself up and be the adult that’s going to your job, that’s getting paid for the good work you do.
I’m feeling desperate, wondering what to do next. I’m in a marriage where my husband constantly criticizes everything I do and criticizes what I don’t do. I feel like he hates me or at least hates the way I move through life. I’m a type three, he is a type one. I am changing our diets. I get criticized for all that too. It is relentless and it is eating away at the core of who I am. I’m starting to feel suicidal at this point. He doesn’t want to divorce. I don’t want to damage my three-year old by divorcing either. She is type two. I feel like I have tried everything. What am I missing?
The clue I have here is that you said you’re changing your diets. Don’t change his diet, change yours. So that leads me to believe that you might be, as a type three, taking charge of too many things that involve him, so he’s feeling powerless to your more determined, demanding presence that you’re running the show for both of you. And he’s not getting a say so his way of trying to kind of wiggle his way into some independence is by putting you down and, you know, kind of beat you down so you back off. Let him change his diet if he wants to. He can cook his own. You know, say, “I’m going to change my diet. You’re free to do what you want.” And I don’t know the agreement you have on who makes the food and who’s cooking and all that, but you might have to work some of that out. But the fact that you changed your diets for…did you ask him if he wanted to change his diet? Was he given that right to choose for himself? Type ones can get really kind of passive…type ones and type twos will get back at you in a passive-aggressive manner to kind of beat you down because they’re feeling controlled by you. And it’s their way of trying to claim their power back in an unhealthy way. But in a manner what you’re doing is unhealthy as well. So where are you taking over that takes away his right of choice? And stop doing that and let him choose and support him in that choice, and even go to him and say, “I recognize I’ve done this and I recognize that this may be…” I don’t know, you start telling…again if you start telling him what he’s doing and what he needs to correct himself because you have all this, you know, newfound wisdom with what you’re learning here, he’s going to feel powerless. So check out your process.
I’m having a great deal of trouble with my body at the moment. My right hand does not seem to want to work correctly and my right arm is hurting all the time. I am not sleeping well and generally feel like I’ve been body jumped by someone else. Are there any ways to protect oneself from being jumped? How does one remove negative attachments?
I’m on neutral ground on… Okay, some of you may go, “What does she means by body jump?” The phraseology I heard in the more alternative healing world is entities, earthbound entities. I’m careful about going there, because it to me can be a scapegoat from you looking at yourself in your own stuff and what cause and effects playing out for you to create this because again, you’re some victim of some scenario that makes you be able to kind of make that claim that this is why I feel this way. I go the route more of all right, apparently my body’s sending me a message. The right side of the body has to do with your yang energy taking charge of your life, moving forward. The yin side is your heart side, which energy is being received, energy is being expressed on the right. This is the masculine or the yang. I prefer to go yin yang because of gender stereotypes, where that’s all getting blown up in our cultural energy anyway, and so yin is soft receiving, the nurturing, the bringing it in, the yang which previously has been referred to as the feminine, but I’m a triple yang female, so see, I didn’t relate to that. That’s my energy type. I teach all that in lifestyle, highly recommend it.
The yang is my outward moving forward. So your arm represents choosing something. I’m choosing and receiving it. I am choosing. Hand. Hand is about…it…a lot of things happen with our hand. We are using it on a daily basis. We drive automobiles. We write. The hand even though it’s a very small part of our anatomy it’s, you know, your hand is used every day and holding on to something, grabbing something, picking it up, choosing it. What are you not choosing to take action on? What are you not grabbing in the moment and you’re still hesitant? I recommend you go do that stuck clearing and you can go through the whole stuck masterclass because you’re stuck. And I actually would recommend you let go of the whole body jumping ideology. I just think when you’re showing up in your energy system, you’re in your body, the likelihood of that, you got to be like on drugs or like really checked out of your body for any energy to like kind of take over, and it’s not that common as much as people have made it, in my opinion. So this is about you and the cause and effect of what you’re not choosing. Your body is finally going, “Hey, you’re not listening. I’m going to give you feedback,” because we pay attention to pain and discomfort in the body finally.
Does the person with the strongest influence energy affect those around them even if it’s negative? I was on a holiday with my parents and one of my sisters, bad things kept happening when we went out, mainly traffic. My dad drives and he’s [inaudible 00:40:07] got angry, pessimistic, and negative. I tried visualizations, affirmation, setting the intention that the day would be great and the roads would be clear for us. My sister also did those things. But in the end, I felt that my dad’s energy kept getting backed up by others and was too strong because the bad things kept happening.
Yeah, I think that…I always say the person with the highest level of consciousness affects the space of all involved. In your case, it’s an interesting phenomena in a family situation because good chance you are aware your dad’s energy as a kid and so who was in the operating frame of mind, was it your inner child trying to switch things versus the adult self showing up and observing all of it playing out and not letting it bother you anymore? Because until you can let go of it having effect on you, you really can’t affect the energy. Because it’s your efforting a prevention mechanism so you don’t get triggered, which is more from the inner child doing the old role. So when you’re in the adult energy, going, “You know, it really doesn’t bother me anymore. I don’t get triggered from this, but I just want a different experience,” then you’ve got the power.
So I suspect that you just, where it was coming from, didn’t have that potency to override your dad because you wouldn’t have been able to as a child. Your dad would have had precedence over you just by the mere fact that he was the adult, you were the child. So keep working on getting present, and notice what it triggered for you. What were you trying…what was your motive in trying to switch the energy which, you know, it’s all favorable, it’s just our ability to affect that shift becomes less potent as I said when we’re trying to prevent something versus creating create something different. Talk about prevention versus creation in “Mastering Affluence,” a really awesome section that I recommend you read and you can examine your life. Most people are living from a place of prevention versus creation and the work we’re doing in here is to free you up so you can be a creator.
My energy and my oldest daughter’s energy seem to be tethered. We’ve heard this from our chiropractor, massage therapist, and others. We’ve always been close, but frequently when one of us is doing some healing work, the other feels significant side effects such as tiredness, sore muscles, moodiness. How do we untether from each other? We’ve done the baggage clearing. She’s done the changing your [inaudible 00:42:39] story clearing. Any other suggestions?
Well, you could cut the energy. I have that in one of my, I’m not sure what session it is, where you literally…you can unwind it. I mean if a tether…who’s got the origin of the energy most and who would be tethered to it? So would it be like an umbilical cord where mom is the original energy source and daughter is the tethered one? Is it vice versa? I learned something interesting. My mother who’s still in a holding pattern right now, she’s not passed on, she’s on hospice, I noticed an eagerness for her to be able, from my point of view, that I couldn’t share with many people because it came across I think as a lack of empathy and care that to this eagerness I felt for my mother to move on. And I really did some deep work on that and recognized that from a very early age, my mother had actually attached her energy to me, that I had become her power source.
And interestingly, I have many memories of my mother saying to me, “You should have been the mother.” And on some level, she understood, she picked up on the fact I was the stronger of us, energetically. I had more awareness of my being. I came in just a more present human that my mother at an early age, probably around age two or three, connected with me as her power source and that was a variable I hadn’t considered that I knew I wasn’t attached to her and her passing that I’d let go. I hadn’t considered she’d not let go of me. And she really wasn’t willing to let go. She was scared and my mother has lived a very fear-based life, lot of major prevention status in her life, making choices to prevent something.
I was raised to prevent my dad from, you know, upsetting my father basically and raised to prevent her upsets which were just a bit of a different quality. And I did a visualization where I saw myself in a white sheath, and she was hanging on to the sheath, and I quietly slipped out of it. And she was still holding on to it but it wasn’t attached to me anymore and I’ve then connected that to her angels and guides to say, you know, I’m going to hand the sheath to you to now create the transition for my mom. And so that I just did within the last week. I’ll keep you posted as to any things that transpire, but that was a variable I hadn’t seen, so I’m sharing that as a… Let me know how that has helped you. I’d be curious what, even in a follow-up post, what aha I know that was meant for, I felt really moved to share that tonight when I had this experience that it would be helpful to some of you.
Okay, just last submission question. Several requests for recommendations are reducing stress of the demands during the holiday season: decorating present activities, gift expectations, finances. Just this is a writing exercise, or do a should scrambler and make it I should, I should, and put in a very general…make a list of everything that goes on your “I should do list” for the holidays. They may be some things you used to enjoy doing that have become kind of a habit or you think you’re going to let people down if you don’t do them. Whatever qualifies, it is a should. Get that list as full as it is, okay? Write it out. I should do. I should do. I should do. And include in that all the things that are stressing you out because that’s part of the stress. You don’t want to do it. You feel you should do it. Or you want to do it but you’re doing a lot of healing work so you just can’t give your energy to some things. That’s the thing.
You don’t have to wash, rinse, repeat every Christmas the same stuff. There are years I’ve never even got…last year I didn’t get a Christmas tree. I just didn’t do Christmas. We went to our kids’ houses. This year I’ll do enough because I’m gonna have family Christmas dinner at my house and I wanted to have some festivity for my grandchildren, you know, I want them to feel they’re in the spirit of the season at our home. And I’ll do enough, but not like I used to. You know, I never do it like I used to. So put all your shoulds on there. Now, go to the should scrambler session and fill in the phrase, “I should, I should do all of this,” meaning everything on your page. “I should, I should not do all of this. I should I should not not do all of this.” Run through the whole scrambler. Do all of the steps.
Now when you’re done with that, look at that list and limit yourself. How many things, first ask yourself and you can even energy test this. See, this test with your thumb and your pinky finger that I teach you in the energy testing. You can even ask your body, your energy system, how many of these is even correct to do. Maybe it’s three. So I get three for me, three. Then pick the three. Then do the reframes. I am comfortable letting go. I’m free to choose what’s correct for me. I’m doing less and experiencing more. Everyone supports me in my decision. I’m enjoying the three things I’m choosing to do. They fall together easily. I’m asking for support with some of the ideas. Like this year, I have an idea, don’t tell my kids, I don’t think they’re gonna watch this. Anne be the only one that would. Here’s my idea. Well I asked my husband, we had a meeting, we sat down I said, “Can we talk about our Christmas gift giving to the family?” Yes, da-da-da. We came up with the budget and we agreed to that. Then I said, “Would you be willing to take care of all the grandchildren’s gifts? I’m figuring the way I would suggest you do it that I’ve done it in years past, is text all their parents and just say, ‘Hey, can you send a link to Amazon for a gift for each of your kids between $25-30?'” Yeah, that gathered within 24 hours. You know, they were boom. He went on and bought them all on Amazon. Okay, so he took care of all that.
What I’m giving the adults is I’m going to do a year of giving. My children are in a timeline where going out on date night, being able to leave the kids home is a really nurturing thing for their relationship once a month, you know. So I’m going to prepare a card, just a simple…I got blank note cards and I’m going to invest in some gift cards and even some cash, and each month I’m going to have them all, the envelopes labeled January through December, and so each month, to their discretion, whatever timeline in the month they want to open that up, that’s their date night gift card or money. And that will range anywhere from, you know, one month I might give them 10 bucks, and say, you know, “Your dad and I used to have fun grabbing a McDonald’s sundae.” So cheap, you know. I don’t visit McDonald’s much, but yeah we have, that has served us, that particular… Or, you know, go have fun off a dollar menu at some fast food. See, and so there’ll be a little bit of a theming around it. In the month of their anniversary, I’ll give them a little more. I might give them a gift card to a Kohl’s or something, they can go shopping. So that’s… Anne, if you’re watching this, she always finds out what I give anyway. So that’s a fun thing for me to do. I have the energy for that this year. Some years I might not. One year I gave everybody the “The Giving Tree” book, the little green book, and I had my Christmas tree which was only a short one on a table I had. Again, I used a lot of gift cards and some cash for this. And the whole tree was a giving tree and they had a round of picking off. So you know, we’d go around and they’d pick a gift card off and we did it again and that was the idea, the theme in that. So those are some fun ideas. So do that to reduce the stress.
Okay, submitted questions for the live timer here. Here we go. Would your chakra course be teaching all of this about the right side compared to the left side? I don’t remember if we included much of that. I don’t recall. And if you own that course, which is no longer available, you’re going to have to go through and see. I’m not sure, but I’ll share those things in this space as needed.
How much does our energy type impact our reactions during the healing program versus our inner child expressing his or herself? For example, if I feel stubborn resistance to a particular portion of a session, could that be my energy expressing type three secondary [inaudible 00:52:02] or is that all from my inner child’s emotional response?
Any resistance isn’t necessarily from any particular energy type. When you’re living in balance with your true self, you attract that which supports you and there’s no longer a resistance to it. So it all does connect with your inner child. And that what type of child you were, what type you are in your childhood definitely could be connected to that.
I’d like more support with grief. I’ve done the single session but feel like I need more guidance. What other resources might help heal this? My dad passed away five years ago this month. His death combined with the holiday season really affects me each year and I want to change this pattern.
You can do a need scrambler. I need, I need my father. All the things you believe you need him for. You can do a mirror session. There’s a lot of release of regrets, unfinished business, that’s going to help you. You’ve got attachments to…certain emotional attachments that you’re putting that in your story that your father is relative to. You want to keep unwinding that, letting go of it so you can connect with your father if you have a belief he exists in a spirit presence. You can receive his support from that space which is much more potent and powerful than any old story you’re hanging on to. What age of you is hanging on to your dad to? Doing some writing, some journaling to help you recognize, I’m getting it’s around seven to eight that you created an attachment, that that part of you does not want let to go. Does not want to let go of your earthly story with your father.
I’m late to the party, so ignore if already dealt with. I’m totally new to the Healing Center, but I’ve only found one clearing for anger. What should someone do who’s anger is destroying relationships and therefore one’s life? It doesn’t seem like one clearing would be enough.
Anger’s a secondary emotion to deeper issues. So, see, anger is a byproduct of what are you angry about? That’s what you got to get to. What is provoking this anger? Are you feeling powerless? Are you feeling taken advantage of? Are you betrayed? See, it’s all which healing plan fits you right now that is feeding this anger. Anger is a secondary emotion that’s provoked by deeper issues that you need to get to. So go to those deeper issues, start healing the deeper issues.
I’ve taken on jobs others are responsible to do for as long as I can remember. I’ve known this but it has surfaced very vividly recently. Now that I know it’s time to shift this, I’m having a hard time figuring out what my jobs actually are. How to know what is mine and create boundaries?
Again, you may have heard me talk about creating discomfort, increasing the discomfort. This is a strategy I use many times in my healing where I say if there’s anything I’m choosing that’s not supportive to my wellbeing and my healing, please make it so clear to me by making it incredibly uncomfortable. Like, ramp it up. I want to know. I want to no longer be okay with this. Increase my discomfort. Help me to feel an increased level of peace and clarity and openness when something is correct for me. Those variables will help you distinguish the difference. Everything’s gotten into this kind of muddled place and you want to separate those energies, those feeling responses so that you can use them as guidance tools.
What tips do you have before a funeral to help support the energy of our dysfunctional family to have a positive loving experience at the funeral? Do the sketching in the healing session where I teach you how to connect everybody with figure eights and ask for your family’s…those who have passed on in your family who can support you from spirit realm to come forward and support harmony, then write affirmations as though it had already happened and saying, “I’m so grateful that at the funeral we experienced,” as though you were looking back at it, reflecting on how peaceful and supportive it played out. Send your angels ahead to start creating that, but go to the energy sketch, which brings me to my activity tonight.
I had an opportunity to coach one of our Healing Center members recently who’s dealt with a state of being manically-depressed. I told her I was going to share this because I felt it was supportive for more of you because a lot of you are learning about how to affect your own energy and train it and create new patterns with it. And so in this member’s case, she was experiencing high highs and low lows. So in the high state, it felt, you know, pretty good to go like be super achiever and kind of over the top in her like, you know, like pedal to the floor approach to life, but it was out of balance. And then that would go to a low that would crash and take her out so that there was not even wanting to be in the body. That discomfort was so profound.
I’m going to show you what I coached her on and invited her to do to retain her energy over time. So your energy runs in patterns and it becomes a habit. You have to train it to run differently when it’s not serving your state of balance. An interesting phenomena as you get used to this to be your set point to say, I know I’m alive when I’m in the states. It’s like you trained yourself to be, again, the Pavlov dog thing to say, this is my point or reference to living. Yet it’s not serving your ability to show up productively in the world and to live your purpose because you’re just coping in dysfunctional states of being.
She said, I would recommend that you have…I only have one color pen to do this with, but if you had four colors, I’m going to show you with one and I’ll differentiate the two. If this was the state of the energy, this wave, see how big high, man, but look at the crash you pay, look at the… And neither one is productive. And let’s say the balance point, the neutral point is…let’s go somewhere. I’ll draw this horizontal line through the middle which should have kind of mean you’re dead, flatline. So you don’t want that. You need to have a high and a…you know, there’s a rhythm to life, an up and a down. But there’s a healthy up and down. So the existing one obviously is not healthy. It’s not sustainable to your wellbeing, nor is it supporting you in living a productive life where you feel fulfilled in a sense of being unable to accomplish things. So after you draw this first line of the extremes that are playing out, you get another color pen and you’re going to modify it with a less high and low. Okay, so we’re going to now do that.
You can see I’ve now created…it’s…we dropped it a bit. The high is not quite so high, the low is not quite so low. It’s gentler. All right. And then you’re going to give yourself time, a week or two in between these. You’ve got to give yourself time to reset. And so what I suggested that you do is when you feel you’re in the high low state, draw it out and then with your hand, imagine if the high is here, this is all just a…you know, symbolic, you’re going to bring it down and shift it. And just draw the wave to be less extreme and breathe that in. So using your hand, you’re gonna bring that down. And you don’t want to go to the extreme because it’s too big of a shift. So then you’re going to now do the third one. And see if you have different colors, you’ll be able to see these. But you see, I brought it down again. Now that’s how much time do you need between, maybe 10 days, a week, 10 days, two weeks, you’re going to train your system to go down even more. And when you’re in the hyper states, the extremes, you’re going to…let’s bring it down. I’m training my energy, bring it down until you get to a fourth one where it’s going to be the most sustainable because it should look sort of like this middle line here. This one. Just a little bit of dip, a little bit of high. And you maybe, you know, this is a thing, that we get addicted to these. This is an addiction and you need to train your system to recognize this to be this is the new familiar. This is my healthy state of being. We have addictive natures just in general, so you want to be addicted to the balance. That’s because addiction just means patterns repeating themselves, so let’s create healthy ones, healthy patterns.
So when you notice you’re running that extreme high, you’re going to now imagine the shift. You’ll sustain, keep training your energy to go to that new state then you’ll do it again. So once you see that you’re in the place towards, adjust, you know, to each one, you create a new set point progressively and this might take, ultimately two, three months to do because you’re going to be retraining your perception of what is normal and what is fulfilling because you may get in these lower and think you’re bored. This is boring. Because that’s something I address in “Mastering Affluence.” I talk about once you get into a state of more balance, a part of you is kind of missing the drama and thinking, “Wow, life’s so, you know, like chill and it plays out so predictively, I’m kind of bored.” I’m so used to drama to entertain me that I had to go through a phase to teach myself that the balance and what can then…balance can appear mundane. And we can get it because we’re addicted to the drama and you have to train your perception of what’s fulfilling in life and your state of being to now see this is very fulfilling. It’s quite lovely, actually. And you’ll be around other people that are all caught up in drama and go, you know, “I don’t just relate to that anymore.” So give yourself those resets, read “Mastering Affluence” to give yourself the added support and if you’ve got these extreme new…if you have rhythms and flows that are not serving you, you can reset them with sketching, and then working in your energy field.
Want to close tonight with a book excerpt from “Mastering Affluence.” Again, I love to hear your feedback. If I answered your question, how…what insight, what takeaway did you get? How was it helpful to you? And even if it wasn’t your question, love the follow-ups being reported on the Facebook group in your own individual posts, sharing what your takeaway was because we all benefit and we love hearing each other’s success stories because they’re just compelling us to continue the process.
This excerpt is called Growing up Emotionally. This is from how to create emotional affluence in “Mastering Affluence.” Emotional affluence looks like no longer hearing emotional energy from your childhood that is either repressed or more often than not triggered and getting the best of you and others. As you pioneer your emotional self and express your repressed feelings, you free yourself up to live in the emotional now. As you continue to claim your emotional inner self and stop carrying the feelings and the stories from the past, you will become emotionally free to feel your current feelings and the range of them as the experience of your life deems appropriate. You’ll become emotionally mature in the present time and have present time feeling experiences. That’s nice because you have so much more energy to use to create your amazing life. I have an amazing life. I really do. I’m sitting here in Hawaii, and the whole many…some of you have heard my story how we acquired this property, my husband and I from our family, I’ll share that with you someday. May have done it in the Money Cure at some point, but it was a miracle, and I receive it.
So next time you have good things showing, you know, as you continue to manifest the good, whether it’s through word or through experience, through gifting, either say out loud or to yourself, “I receive this. It’s my new norm.” And keep letting it be your new norm. Did you like tonight’s call? Let me know how it was helpful to you, what you’re doing with these. We’ll see you later.
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